Who are you? Is EVERYTHING about identity politics

Hi Love,

Who are you?

Who do you belong to?

These questions were posed to me and a group of type A high-achievers. Abstract, philosophical and potentially squishy questions.

Person, places and the issue of identity is picking up momentum and taking up space in our collective consciousness. Within the last ten days, I've had four separate conversations about identity and identity politics.

The interesting thing is that I am both for and against identity. How can something be both true and not true?!

When discussing inequality I believer race and gender are important intersectional factors that are critical to the discourse. A discussion on inequality (in every level) without factoring in the person or the group's race and gender leads us to a Calvinist Republican attitude towards poverty alleviation, i.e., hardwork alone, pull yourself up by your bootstraps kind of policies (it hasn't worked).

At the same time, not every action someone makes is an insult perpetrated based on identity, it can be, but not always. For examples, members of a women group I am part of often interprets everything through a gendered lens. Every slight inflicted is simply because they are a woman; every additional responsibility assigned is because women are often asked to do more (often unpaid).

I wish there is a defined line. Categorical choices for when you are in discussion of XYZ, all aspects of identity is critical and should be considered; and when conversations are about ABC, maybe we should step back from filter everything through the lens of race, gender, class, and etc., and consider it on human grounds first and foremost. The line is faint and the playbook is blank.

What do we do?

Some of the more intriguing ideas that floated across my view this week on the issues of identity include:

1. 9/11 was a defining point in elevating identity and identity politics. (Interesting. I hadn't considered trying to pinpoint a turning point for when we started looking at ourselves and each other through this inflection point.)

2. Identity is so fraught, so impossible to talk about in the current climate, fiction becomes the only safe space for exploration. (I have lots of thoughts on the role of fiction which I'll follow up in another note later).

3. Identity politics is entirely an invention of the US. (I completely disagree with.)

Daughter, American, Woman, Photographer, Nomad, USC Alumni, Expat, Writer, Chinese, Agnostic, Goth, Rebel, Wife, New Yorker, Globe Trotter, EHF Fellow, Creative Director, Taiwanese, Adventurer, Executive Director are only some of the identities that I've worn, discarded and claimed. Yet none of them are my first instinct when someone asks me how I consider myself.

I am me. And I belong to myself.

That is my first answer and the one that feels the most truthful. Every other label, albeit many of them are outside of our control, are like a costume, something we can slip on and off, ever-changing and shifting, depending on the audience.

Who are you, my love? And who do you belong to?

Your Ever Shapeshifting

Charlie

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

Instagram fanatics! Buffer introduced a new feature this week where the app will fill out the first comment on a new post for you. What do you mean? Instagram allows for up to 30 hashtags per post, but you don't want all those tags to be in the description of the post ~ it looks sloppy. So, this means you can post the majority of them, say 27 of those relevant hashtags in the first comment section. Now, Buffer will do that for you. 

WORTH A READ

Against Identity Politics. The New Tribalism and the Crisis of Democracy
By Francis Fukuyama (Foreign Affairs)
Don't let the title fool you. Fukuyama lays out the wins and fails of identity politics, areas and examples where it was great for propelling the agenda forward: #METOO, Black Lives Matter, and also the shortcomings: the rise popularism worldwide. He also offers some concrete suggestions on what is missing and ways to reframe the conversation going forward.  
 

WANDERLUST

(upcoming) Norway, Thailand, Kurdistan, and Boston. DC has been postponed. 

DON'T MISS

Billions (Showtime). It's not a super addictive show, you can pace it out and sometimes that is a great thing. The writing and acting are super solid. It's a great cipher to understand what motivates people. 

Who is Denting the Universe?

Hi Love,

In reply to last week's note, one of you wisely said, "the world is very judgmental. [And For most of us] it is a delicate balance in sharing our depth and safeguarding our vulnerability." 

Later that night, after issue 14 went out, I saw Amanda Palmer on tour for her new album, "There will be No Intermission." My love for Amanda resides in my head rather than in my gut, such as my love for Pearl Jam, but the difference between one versus the other is another note for another day.

"There will be no Intermission" is a Bruce Springsteen style show where the talent does a lot of storytelling throughout and play a little music along the way; the songs are the fruit of the stories that precede it. The narrative is personal, Springsteen talked about his alcoholic father and depressed mother, Amanda Palmer spent four hours talking about death and abortion. It was intense. It was depressing. It was deeply personal. 

It is not unusual for artists to mine their personal lives for raw materials for their art. Both male and female artists have done it, Bukowski and Plath are just two of such artists staring back at me from the bookshelves. What is striking about Amanda's latest work is how naked and vulnerable she allows herself to be, even more so that the deepest confessional poets. The artifice was that there is no artifice. Just Amanda. 

What Amanda did on stage was the antithesis of Witches in the C-Suite. Some say that she is preaching to the choir, her fans, and does little to move the needle beyond her reach, i.e., Texas state legislature, but I disagree. She put something out in the Universe and it will have a ripple effect. The frustration is the inability to accurately measure the impact. 

A few nights later, I saw Melinda Gates in conversation with Brene Brown. Melinda Gates is currently on tour promoting her new book, "The Moment of Lift." 

"The Moment of Lift" talks about a variety of challenges women all over the world face: unpaid work, access to capital, education, healthcare and etc. Big gnarly topics, each impacting women's lives intimately. 

During the conversation with Brene, Melinda opened up (a little) about reconciling her Catholicism and Gate's global initiative to increase access to birth control (Depo-Provera not condoms) but the conversation is as you would expect from someone of Melinda's stature, composed, measured. Suitable for the C-Suite. Thesis to Amanda's antithesis. 

Melinda's work in gender equality through both the Gates Foundation and her personal channels are guided by quantitative data, a 30,000 view from high, and the impact of the work is carefully measured. Amanda's work is driven by qualitative data and often limited to her own experience. Yet a fundamental core of their work shares an acknowledgment, "I see you, I hear you." You need someone to express all the pain and fear and loneliness that is part of life. You need someone to hear your need and struggle." 

They each come at the work from a different vantage point, and vastly different style and flare. There is no right way. Feminists and Patriarchy both want us to believe that there is an only way, a more effective way, a more impactful method.  Yet that is not life. A single input, a tweak in the variables, and there is an observable change in outcome. We will never know with certainty which approach will move the needle more, or if the existence of the antithesis is essential for the thesis to succeed. 

With Love, 

Charlie 

PS. Promise next week it will not be about women, gender and etc....

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

I'm short on amazing tricks and hacks this week. The best advice we gave to clients all week is:you need to consult a lawyer on this.

I know, if you are anything like me, the idea of a lawyer is scary!!! It's grown up stuff. Am I in trouble? It sounds really expensive. Here is the thing, there are many situations in life where you will be better off to engage the advice of counsel then to muddle it out on your own. Our client might very well be in a pickle because their first call was not to a lawyer. 

On the note of lawyers, Facebook's new general counsel is Jennifer Newstead, a key player in the creation of the Patriot Act and making it palatable for the American public. Which means....might be time to seriously consider divorcing FB and Instagram. 

WORTH A READ

(How) Patriarchy is Spoiling America’s Next Election One of America’s Next Great Tests is Whether it Can Transcend Patriarchy — and It’s Already Flunking - by Umair Haque
There are so many insightful (and no duh moments in this essay, it's astounding when its all laid out with such clarity." One of them is "the deep, hidden double standard that men can prove their character by what they’ve done, but women can only prove their character by what they haven’t." On point with thesis and antithesis,

WANDERLUST

Norway is ON! Thailand just got added to the list as well. I've been honored with the Kravis Leadership Moonshot House Fellowship which will take place this year in Thailand in June. The immediately after I will leave for Kurdistan Iraq for round two of Hello Future. The summer schedule is getting packed and I must admit, I'm tired and it's not yet May. 

DON'T MISS

Our Plant on Netflix narrated by David Attenborough. 
First of all, it's amazing! Incredible footage as you've come to expect from Blue Planet and Planet Earth (BBC). It's even better (in my opinion) because Attenborough uses this opportunity to highlight the perils of climate change. A missing narrative and missed opportunity in those previous series. 

Witches in the C-Suite

Hi Love,

Someone recently asked if anyone had a recommendation for a tarot card reader on a private all women group I belong to. She is hosting a party and would like to hire a reader for entertainment. 

Members come forth with recommendations aplenty. The popularity of this thread prompted conversation and astonishment, "look at all of us, witches and pagans in hiding." 

It's important to note that this list is exclusive. The women here are C-level executives, big-time investors, famous media personalities, award-winning journalists. In a word, led-git.

Despite all of the professional credos, we still hold back these deepest part of ourselves, parts that are perceived to be fringe, woo-woo, unscientific, therefore women's business.

Why is that? 

Is this just the double standard women feel like we must live with? We've worked so hard to be taken seriously, we do not want to risk it by admitting to our obsession with the esoteric. 

Yet, there is no shortage of male investors and entrepreneurs bragging about their latest Ayahuasca ceremony or attending Burning Man with gusto. 

Meanwhile, I've been asked to help review some incoming applications for the Edmund Hillary Fellowship (FULL DISCLOSURE, I am a fellow). In the review guidelines, we are asked to not only consider the idea for the venture but also who they are as a person. 

Out of the eight applications I reviewed, only three people filled out the personal section of applications, the rest left it blank, and only one provided sufficient and compelling materials on who they are. Only ONE application out of Eight had enough confidence/trust/vulnerability to share who they are with the reviewers.  The rest of the applications I had to evaluate the ventures alone. 

We hear this said all the time by VC's, that they are investing in the person and not the idea. 

Yet, there are still many who are reluctant to put who we are out there, front and center. Even in this oversaturated world of personality brands and influencers, even when it is culturally acceptable, encouraged by investors. 

Why do you think that is? 

Happy Easter! 

Charlie

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

We talk about the importance of diversity in companies, C-suits, and corporate boards, really, everywhere. Recent research fromColumbia Business Schoolshows that living abroad and dating someone from another countryimproves our own creativityand creativity tests in the real world. All the more reason to get out of your comfort zone and date someone with a different cultural perspective. 

WORTH A READ

Keeping in themes with this week's note...

Venture Capitals are Investing in Astrology, via The New York Times 
Amazon Prime is using Astrology to Sell You Stuff, via Fast Company
The New Age of Astrology, via The Atlantic

And if you want something fun to read and still on-topic, I recommend A Discovery of Witches Trilogy. 

I'm flirting with a full stack of books right now, some new, some old. I haven't landed in one just yet...when I do, we will return to long-form reads. 



WANDERLUST

Thanks to all of your nudges, I will be heading to Oslo for the Oslo Freedom Forum and spending a few extra days there as well. So keep your Norway recommendations coming. I know it's an expensive country...What was the highlight to your Norway Adventures?

DON'T MISS

Stranger Magic, A Podcast about all things Tarot. 
And of course, if you are not in the mood for 600 pages, try the TV adaptation of A Discovery of Witches. Matthew Goode is still ever so handsome and enjoyable to watch. 

Don't Marry Him For His Record Collection

Hi Love,

This weekend J and I are celebrating our two year anniversary. We have many anniversaries; we like celebrating the absolute joy of being together. This weekend marks our very first coffee, not a date, a work-related coffee where I got to ask him lots of questions about non-profits and foundation funding. 

J's presence, his life story, the work he has dedicated his life to influences me and my thinking on multiple fronts. He grew up in the projects in the South Bronx and a person of color. By luck and happenstance, his father was told to get young J tested and see if his test scores are good enough to attend one of the elite public schools in the city. Getting accepted into Hunter College Campus Schools changed his life, this education helped him reach far in his life and career. 

I grew up in a low-middle income family that eventually worked itself to be high-middle income. Life was never extravagant as the fear of near poverty never left my parents and grandparents. Yet inequality, privilege and greater racial dynamic are academic concepts to me rather than a personal one. 

I don't think of myself as a Chinese American woman with an excellent education, upper-middle-class income and achieved a fascinating career path. I didn't realize it was unusual to not consider myself in the standard classifications. This is not to say that I don't understand how the external world sees me, I just don't use these identifiers instinctively.  

Issues of privilege and inequality are top of mind for J. It is part of his work, his worldview. And his view has seeped into mine, broadening and deepening my scope. This is a gift I couldn't have anticipated. It sounds silly to say because every significant other have left their mark, some deeper than others, some in attitude towards life while others only their obsession with Peter Gabrielle. 

There are so many things I wish we were briefed on as young adults, about love, life, money, career, partnership. So many miss opportunities where we could have made better choices, saner choices. It took me thirty-eight years to get love and partnership right and I am ever so grateful I finally figured it out. 

With Love, 

Charlie

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

In a recent client memo, I outlined a 101 on sponsorships/partnerships/collaborators. 
Sponsorship: A brand/company, usually for-profit. 

Partnerships: Tangentially mission/project aligned institutions, non-profits, and for-profits. 
Notable Personality/Influencers: People with a significant following (social and otherwise) and influence over their audience.

Then under each category, we break down what the ask is (monetary/in-kind donation, cross-promotion), the upside for them (their motivation for supporting the client/cause), and the upside for the client. 

It's a helpful cheat sheet to think about who to approach and what a reasonable ask could be. 

WORTH A READ

Austin Kleon's Keep Going is out. Full disclosure, I've not read the book (yet) but I'm a big fan of his previous title, Steal Like an Artist. It's great and I think even more insightful for those who are not artists or have such inclinations. 

WANDERLUST

Oslo, Norway. I've been invited to a conference and all-conference is a mixed bag of "meeting you changed my life" and "I should have stayed home." Has anyone been to Oslo? Tell me what it's like and help me tally the pro/con.

DON'T MISS

I binged watched Orphan Black, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel and Killing Eve this past month. It was A LOT of TV but there were a lot of long flights and even longer layovers. 

Each of them features fascinating female characters. I particularly liked Orphan Black and Killing Eve.